One

*** While reading this blog entry it is highly recommend listening to "The Art of Sucking Cock" by N.W.A. (Niggaz With Attitude). This is the song that kept playing through my head during the entire following experience. And it may help the reader understand my plight and my mind set a bit better. ***

     At age 19 I have had very few sexual en devours. These have just started recently in fact, February 2007. And any sexual en devours that have occurred in my life just end up in shambles, along with most of my relationships. But that is another story. I have currently found myself into a relationship with a Virgo, Leo, Leo. I use to think he was a Virgo, Leo, Cancer but thankfully his birth time was wrong making him a Virgo, Leo, Leo. I had mistaken the over-emotionalness of a cancer ascendant with the intensity of a Leo ascendant. I know he cares about me, but I also know Virgoeans are not really expressive with their words vocally and tend. So you just have to pick up on the signs and hope you are reading them correctly. What I like most about him is that he doesn't jump the gun, he only says what he feels, not what he thinks he feels, or things to get me in bed, so I know when he does say things they are truthful.
     I am rather infamous for my fear of sex, sexual organs and sexual things. So, I said to myself, "Girl, you have to get over your fear." Though we have only been together for a short period of time, he stuck by my side through one of the hardest times of my life, and stuck by my side knowing I loved someone. So, I have to give my little Virgoean lots of credit, for being so good. He did what most men wouldn't do. I haven't grown dependent on him, but I have become very fond of his company and care. I could live without it, but I would rather not. So, by his actions I am aware of his feelings for me. And because of his genuine nature, I am more comfortable with him then I have been with anyone. I also get this feeling that he cares about me as a person, not as the the idea of me. Which is a first.
     So, over this past weekend after starring at a penis for 15 minutes repeating the words, "alright", "ok", "then", and "give me a minute!, touching it with my nose, and pushing back tears, and basically being my sex-a-phobic self I did it. I did it. For like 5 seconds, but I did it. But that was enough for me, so I finished him off with a hand job. But so, after he was done we lay down on the bed, we are laying there face to face. And the first thing he says to me is, "I have a question. When we are at ____ earlier, did you fart on me?" After a few angry words, and him telling me it was just, "I did it to lighten the mood and I was curious!" I informed him that I was too tired to be angry, and that I would finish the job the next morning. Which I did. He is a sweet kid, but god can he be clueless about women. This is one of those first times that could only happen, to the one, the only, me. But if ridiculous things like this didn't happen to me, it n'tbe my life, or the relationships in it.

In other really lame news...I am ridiculously addicted to this song...some may see it as a sign of lameness. I see it as, I am so awesome, I can listen to really bad built-to-sell pop and make it look cool.