Thirteen

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It has been a week or so since I updated. I apologize for that. Life has been rather hectic, though boring. I have been cleaning my room and getting ready for the big move back to New Brunswick. I have had some fun though in between. I have been hanging out with Krystal and Zachary a lot. Other than some typically boardwalk nights and raping Encyclopedia Dramatica not much has happened.

On Thursday I actually did do something mildly interesting. Though it might actual sound boring to talk about. But I will anywho, so fuck off those who don't appreciate at it. Just scroll down a bit. I went to New York City with the parental unit. She was in prime form for a good part of the morning, but chilled out by the end. We had to leave early because she completely busted her ass. I do love this bat crazy woman, but it took so much not to laugh hysterically. I actually got 5 pairs of pants. We went to the Mythical Creature Exhibit at the Museum of Natural History(When ever I say this, I say it like they did in the movie We're Back), which was amazing. I totally fell in love with the Kraken. It was this huge sculpturesque such thing, that was made out of weird spungy stuff. I loved it. There was also this gorgeous Unicorn, that I actually spent 10 minutes just stroking it's gorgeous glittery white foot. It was the most splendiferous thing I have ever witnessed in my life. I personally believe this was the single most happy moment in my life. In amazing news, I got this awesome Galileo Doll. I take him everywhere. He is my new Bfflz.

I had to go into the shower when we got home because I fell into urine in NYC. Foulest thing ever. While I was in the shower, Michael called me, and I believe his mother thinks we were having phone sex. But we only do that in private. Pictionary is possibly the greatest game ever. I ended up playing it with Gina, the Amandas, Dan, and Jon. Jon was my partner, we got the most ridiculous words. I will take any person out for ice cream who can draw a guessable picture of a triple by pass. LAME ASS SHIT.

This weekend is Mike's Birthday weekend. He is 23 years old this Sunday. What an old man, donate money to my pay pal account so I can afford to buy him a walker plz. There was wining and dining without the wine. Though Michael drinks beer like the earth ran out of water. Not really, but really. We went to Philedelpia so I could get my beloved Sundea and walked around. He got me this gorgeous necklace from his travels. It made me ridiculous happy. I also got these bangin' Aquarius earrings. After we walked around we bounced and went to Drew's. By the time we got there everyone was already several drinks in. I love those boys' love of alcohol. Conversation and late night frizz bee is basically what went on that night. Details are boring, and I have bored you enough in this entry. But, at least you got a whole bunch of pictures of me to look at.

A secret is I have been bleeding from my vagina since I was in the hospital. I am very scared. I am going to my first gyno appointment on Monday. Though now it has become very light barely there. I am sure it is just my period acting up, but I am a bit scared. I am also scared if has to do with me having sex. I probably made a bad decision to have sex while this whole bleeding vagina thing was going on. But I haven't fucked my boo for three weeks. Plus, I would rather ignore the entire thing and pretend it is not happening or bad until I have confirmed proof. I am so scared to goto the gyno. I am so scared that my mom will find out I got fucked. I know she thinks I am too young, but I am so happy with him. I don't regret the decision. I just hope I am not sick.

Michael and I fucked for the first time in a long while. It did no last as long as Michael wished it to. On my end it does not matter if it last two minutes or an hour. My problem is I don't feel any pleasure yet and I feel like Michael takes it out on himself. It isn't his fault at all. I mean, I should feel something. But I barely feel anything, bleeding vagina or not. I ended up crying because I was so upset that I did not feel anything. If I had one wish, it would be to feel things during sex. I feel like I am a freak of nature. I think about it, it seems so unfair. Everyone else gets to feel good during sex except me.

Today was a pretty regular day. We went to the mall to look for Nike Dunks for me. But none of them were fabulous enough. Then shortly after Michael's Party began. His friends are really nice, and I really like them. They are just as equally interesting and educated as they are nice. So they are fun to be around. This is new to me, since every other boy that was my boyfriend or dated friend's were either uneducated/retarded or lame. I have been on this Macbook too long , and the party is going on without me, so I better get back. That is right, I am writing this journal entry during my boyfriend's birthday party. I'm lame I guess, but I got bored of discussions of politics, so I decided to do something productive. I will give more details about this night soon. <3 style="font-weight: bold;">This is possibly the funniest video on the internet y/y?:

Twelve

So it is almost 2 in the morning, and I am watching The Pick-Up Artist with Mystery. One thing I would like to say is all of these "Master" pick-up artists look straight up foul. If they ever came up to me, I would viciously attack their dressing skills. No one wears leather, furry hats, and studs in their chin. Nor do they have weird freak ass streak in their hair or freaky greasy long hair. These things are not what I personally consider hot. But the babes on the show just seem to eat it up. Plus their lines are completely foul. "Do you consider it cheating if the girl kisses the guy?" or "Do you floss before or after you brush." WTF is that shit. Not suave. That would be the correct answer. Sometimes that show becomes way too painful to watch. Black nail polish? I mean....come on!

Speaking of bad pick-ups, I shall enchant you with the story of my day. I spent the morning with Zachary, cleaning and watching the Pokemon Movie 2000. AKA a whole bunch of awesome. After Zachary left, I also realized I got a message from Mike. I don't think he'll mind if I post it, because it just fills my heart with such joy.

I'm so glad to here from you my dear Tricia. I hope you're all back to normal and it's good that your period shit is not so out-of-whack anymore. I've seriously missed you a lot this past week. I'll tell you about the details later. I felt so scared when you started to go into shock, but looking at you in the hospital bed made me realize how much I care about you. I'll try to talk later babe, sugartits.

- Mike

Mike's little e-mail reminded me why I adored him so much. One, because he called me sugartits. Two, because he is so amazingly frank. And three, because he manages to be foul and sweet in the same little blurb. It is why we go so well together.

Once I was done writing up a response, I went to dinner and the mall with Mother. Picked up some new, but not as fabulous sunglasses to hold me off until better come a long. I also got a whole bunch of adorable outfits. I got this dress that with some accessories I made completely banging. I couldn't find anything I thought was good enough for Michael for his birthday, but I will keep looking.

LETS TAKE A BREAK AND ENJOY THE FACT THAT MIKHAIL GORBACHEV IS NOW A MODEL FOR LOUIE VUITTON. I FUCKING LOVE GORBY.

After ice cream with the mother I headed out with Krystal. We went to the boardwalk to play big bug hunt and walk. I ended up getting hit on by this swarthy indie fag. He was covered in awful Point Pleasant done tattoos and an outfit straight out of American apparel. He was mackin' it to me all night, so Krystal and I made a joint decision to go with it because we knew it would bring the lolz. It did. I gave him my phone number. These are the best text messages I got from him.

Me and my friendwant u idk what to do

I want u to hook up with me

Piecies lets hook up

Lets go i want u

Lets go to my houre

Let me know when ur alone

Are u gana hook up with us?

It is like, are you kidding me? One your spelling and grammar is atrocious. Two, usually girls don't get turned on by being treated like a one night fling boardwalk slut. After his roffle messages and several calls, I sent him a really intense message that basically said that if you want pussy, try to be more suave and don't treat the girl you are trying to mack it to like a whore. I also added I was very happy with my boyfriend. A 20 year old should know that, and not be hanging out at Point Pleasant to pick up girls. Krystal and I were getting mildly freaked out when he wouldn't stop calling. I was also accosted by a group of gangsta 16 year olds. Who informed me that I was a hot girl, and that I should holla. I was also attacked by a group of biking 14 year olds. They were freaking out over my black cigarette saying, I did not come from the Jersey Shore, and that I was a Pussy Cat Doll and not to mess with me. IDK, it was an interesting night at the boardwalk. Some how I just naturally attract crazy PISCES. After the boardwalk Krystal and I watched the Roast of Flava Flav. I have decided I want to marry Snoop Dogg. He is such a sassy beast. While watching Flava Flav the weird kid kept calling me. Krystal's mother asked me who was calling, and I responded some kid from the boardwalk. She then instructed me to watch out and not to accept calls from extraterrestrials. That they will cause me nothing but trouble. I love Krystal's mom.

Oh well, I'm gana go now. I have folding to do..I should do a bit before I goto bed.

Puppet Pals, I told you I was a nerd:

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Photography taken by Samantha.

Elven

Sorry for not keeping up this week. A lot has happened in a short period of time. When things weren't happening, I was kind of in a foul mood and it reflected in my writing. It wasn't my typical sass talk. It was more melancholy and lame. So, you may be asking yourself...what has Tricia been up to? Tricia had a very exciting weekend, but let us pause ourselves for a moment and start with last Thursday. Last Thursday I hung out with Zachary and Kevin. We created high jinx at Point. Zachary was on a roll. Including going over to a group of guys trying to mack it to these teenage girls and saying, "Good things you guys aren't zombies. Because you would make a necrophiliac out of me." Zachary and I had to goto bed early though, because we had a busy day a head of us.

Friday was the day of my Cannibal Party. By that I mean it was cannibal themed, I played the movies Cannibal Holocaust and Dumplings. Zachary and I got up early and cleaned the basement, got the snacked together, got me pretty, and set up for the party. While waiting for the lovely Melody Lee to arrive we went and got me cigarettes and Zachary a Tamagotchi of his own. Which if I haven't mentioned I have gotten a Tamagotchi. Her name is Utena, and she is the most precious thing in my life. Melody got lost in Brick. Since, no navigation system/map quest can get anyone to my house. I had to pick her up from one of the many Wawa's in my area. But that is when the party started. I missed that little girl so much.

Since everyone but Melody and Zachary thought it would be cool to be fashionably late, the party did not get started until 7:30. But before I knew it, my little basement was filled with people ready to watch some bitches get eaten. Almost everyone from town I invited came. When Mike came, I was the happiest girl in the world. He was wearing one of my favorite shirts. He was simply adorable. I trash on him so much to his face. But he is so special to me. Just seeing his face lights my heart with joy. He is the sweetest kindess man I have had the pleasure of meeting. I am the luckiest girl in the world to call him my boyfriend. I feel like I don't treat him well enough. Or if I have the capability to treat him as well as he deserves. But I am so thankful to have him. My party went excellent. Everyone who went had fun. It was a lot of talking, screaming, freaking out, laughing, and Ann Frank. My mother even iced my cake in a cannibalistic manner. This was quite possibly my greatest party ever. It was filled with great people, great movies, and lots of treats. What more could you want from a cannibal gather? After everyone left, the events that followed shall stay out of my blog and stay in my basement. For the safety of all parties involved.

So, Melody, Mike, Joe and I attempted to goto the beach. But that failed due to the red flag warning. So we ended up just chilling at Point. Typical day for me right? Melody and I were the catty bitches we were born to be. While Mike and Joe seemed rather surprised by it. I love Melody's mock Mike voice. She is actually better at it then I am. Around 2ish Melody left to goto the gym, and then there was 3. We went to Mike's and I's typical coffee shop. Mike puts so much sugar in his coffee. It even takes me aback. We also went to that adorable used book store in Point. Joe had a field day. I love sneaking up on Mike in used bookstores. It is just so creepy.

*Warning - Things Actually Get Interesting*

So following we went to a Kaya's. During our typical after dinner walk, I started to feel dizzy, my lungs tightened and sick. I feel the great desire to take off my clothes and be in a bathroom. I found myself on the floor of a Dunkin Donuts bathroom suffering from anaphylactic shock and at the same time I got my period for the second time within 10 days. When you have anaphylactic shock there are three things you want from life:

1. To breath(Which you know isn't going to happen anytime soon).
2. To be naked(You feel claustrophobic in your clothes).
3. To be in a bathroom/Laying down

I didn't realize at I ran into the bathroom that Mike and Joe stayed outside. So I was screaming Mike's name, but no one was coming. I couldn't figure out why. Finally I guess ten minutes passed and Mike finally became worried and came in. He found me in the bathroom without my shoes or my underwear on, and with my dress hiked up around my waist. I said in short speak for him to go get help. Ironically enough there was a cop at the Dunkin Donuts and help arrived rather fast. After Mike got the cop to call for help, he went to check on me. By this time I had my eppy pen in my hand. He asked me if I needed him to stabbed me with it. I just looked at him and stabbed myself. His response was, "OMG, you just stabbed yourself!" and when I ripped it from my leg, "OMG, there is actually a needle in those things!" He has the best reaction to things ever.

Finally he got me out of the bathroom when help came. They put an oxygen mask on me, but I pushed it off and ran into the bathroom again. When I go into anaphylactic shock I loose all control of my organs. They parametric would not let me be in the bathroom a lone, so they made Mike go with me. So while I basically shit my brains out, Mike was standing in the corner. I did not realize how embarrassing this entire ordeal was until 24 hours later, which when I did realize, I cried. That is probably the worst moment of my entire life. But I guess Mike really does love me. Yay for that.

So I leave the bathroom for my finally and second time, and they try to sit me in a chair and put an oxygen mask on me. All I want to do is lay down on the ground of the Dunkin Donuts. But they would not have me lay on the ground, I guess. Because they asked for towels, and when they didn't get any they didn't let me lay on the ground. I was really pissed about that. Meanwhile, while I am being taken care of by the paramedics, Mike is starring at me holding my shoes, purse, and the used eppy pen and Joe is just in the corner starring, mouth slightly open. As they brought me to the van, the paramedic actually yelled at a guy who was in the Dunkin Donuts, "What are you looking at? There is nothing to see here!" They took me into the ambulance and some how Mike and Joe weaseled there way into the emergency vehicle, even though they normally only allow one person to assist they dying. The woman on the ambulance was really sweet and let me hold her hand. All I kept repeating was I didn't want to die. People who don't suffer from anaphylactic shock will never know how frightening it is to not be able to control any part or function of your body.

When I got to the emergency room, a sassy gay man said, "MMmmmm Honey, you might not like how I do things, but I get things done right!" and flipped me onto the bed and brought me over to a secluded hospital room. I love when they give me my own room. Mike and Joe were following hopelessly behind. Once there they hooked me up to a new oxygen mask, pumped me full of medicine, shoved an IV in my arm, and hooked me up to several machines. But slowly I began to stabilize. Mike held my hand and stroked my head. I felt so safe but a little bit sad. These would be the last memories Mike and I have until the 24th. Mike was schedules to be at a plane at 4am the next morning. Joe was standing in the corner and one of the few things he said was, "Tricia, watching you is very tiring." I guess that is understandable. I don't really remember a lot of what went on before my mother came. I was under the influence of sleepy medicine. But I did not sleep. It is a jumble of Mike comforting me and Joe saying awkward things like, "I can't stop watching your IV drop, it is so hypnotizing." Those two boys really took care of me though. I will remember that. Joe even made sure he took all the cigarettes out of my purse, so my mom wouldn't find them. Mike is so good to me, he said he would have stayed as long as he could without missing his flight. I must reiterate that I am the luckiest girl in the world.

Once my mother arrived she basically kicked them out. I did get some a lone time with Mike though. He told me he wanted to fuck me. I told him that we should. He was just kidding. But he should have. I then posed with oxygen mask and travel IV and instructed him that, "No matter what, I was still sexy." We gave each other our lasts kisses for two weeks, I was crying because I a, and Mike told me, "Tricia, you always go out with a bang." I gave my last hugs to Mike and Joe and my mom drove them home. I cried really hard, I was a lone in a hospital room for two hours. I had never felt so a lone in my life. When my mom came back she brought me a Blendini from Rita's. It made me feel better, but it was no Mike. Around 12 I went home...still weak from my entire incident. Well, at least it was an exciting weekend. I think I shall leave it at that...more another day..

Lets kick it back old school:

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Photography taken by Samantha.

Ten

I was a complete wreck Friday. For one thing, I had nothing to wear. Now sure, you may say to me, "Tricia, you have more clothes then the entire population Burma, when it existed." But I would simply reply, "Well, that is not enough." I live by one rule, and one rule alone, Always be fabulous. And, I am. I ended up just packing a ridiculous, unnecessary amount of clothes so I could possibly put something together at Mike's house. But I got this adorable new Blue/Brown dress from the shop my mother works out, so I knew at least Friday I would look banging.

This was the first time I ever went to Mike's house not upset. Usually something happens in my life, that by Friday afternoon I am in shambles. So this time, I was able to just attack and cuddle the bitch. We went out to eat with his Dad. He is an Aquarius who likes things just so, and doesn't like spending money. He is a rather funny man, who calls his Virgoean wife a Dyke. It is kind of funny, because when I am mad/annoyed with Mike, I act a lot like his dad. I am always like, "You stupid little cunt/bitch." or, "Fuck you woman." much like his dad's "You stupid dyke, shut the fuck up." It is pretty amusing, to me anyway.

Friday night really was not filled with mystery or intrigue. We went for a walk around a lake. Just talking and holding hands. What I love about Mike and I is that we could just walk and smoke, and consider that a good time. Then after this I am not really sure what happened. Friday was too long ago at this point. But we ended up getting ice cream and talking to Mike's interesting friend. I learned that abortion could be illegal, but killing someone should be legal. Leos always bring the LoLz.

Mike and I fucked twice Friday Night. Mike is possibly the luckiest man in the world now. We had sex five times this weekend. I just want to get fucked until it feels good. I want to feel this amazing feeling that everyone else feels when they have sex. It has to be good, or else people would not do it. So, I am going to have Mike fuck me as often as possible, until I can enjoy it at least half as much as everybody else does. The first time was a lot more painful in comparison to the second. It took him only 15 minutes to get hard again. I was surprised. I really did not enjoy it. But it did not hurt as bad as it did last week. So for that I was happy. Though it did not feel good, at least it was bearable.

Saturday we were woken up early to pick up a dresser for Mike's sister Kristen. It was in Philadelphia, so we ended up spending the day there. When I look back at all the memories Mike and I have created this summer, most of them involve walking and talking. It is strange, we can have moments of comfortable silence, but these are far and few. Early in the day he said something really inconsiderate to me. Which eventually lead to me being so depressed I threw up twice. Bulimia is a hard habit to kick. But I know he did not mean it cruelly, he just does not understand what it is like to live inside my skin. I cannot except him to. I just have to realize he will never be able to comprehend what it is like having and eating disorder, and not get upset when he does not understand it. To apologize Mike did get me this lovely dress though. It is so adorable and strange. He also got me this interesting circle necklace and a unicorn necklace. He really is such a lovely guy. He has his...off moments, but nobody is perfect.

We went around town, looking for clothes for Mike. We found ourselves in a Park, wanting to have a cigarette and a chat. We ended up being attacked by two homeless people. One claiming to be a part of the foot ball team, raising money. The other one was just some cracked out homeless man with two different shoes who took Mike's cigarette. We decided it was best we peace and went to Barns and Nobles. I was looking at a Russian Vogue, and worked on my pronunciation while Mike was fucking the Computer section. He is such a geek, but that is one of the reasons I am so attracted and relate to him. We headed back home, so Mike could change out of his faggy shorts, and get a shower. Mike and I tried to have random sex in his basement. It really did not work out that well. I have never felt such pain in my life. My pussy was actually burning. BURNING. I could not even move or deal. I was sobbing hysterically. I ended up just jerking him off while crying. I cannot imagine how awkward that is for him, I mean, all he does is watch a crying like a bitch make him cum. It cannot be that sexy.

Joe, Mike and I went to this very enjoyable Mexican restaurant. The waitress ended up being one of their friends, and gave us free drinks. Which was really nice of her. While we took a walk around Haddenfield(sp?idfc), some man in a car screamed, "Man, you are a fucking bean pole." at Mike. That may be the greatest thing Mike and I have ever had screamed at us. Minus,"Hey girl, where are you going with that fine ass. Hey boy, can't you share?" I was designated driver, so once everybody was rounded up in my car we headed over to Mike's. Where the night was spent talking about this and that. It is just kind of funny, it was three men from 22-24, drinking beer, and a 19 year old girl eating a self-made sundae.

I will take this moment to totally jump off topic, and be like, WTF is with Sarah Jessica Parker

Her new commercial makes her look mad creepy and like a crack addict. Idfk, it is the shit my nightmares are made of. Do you see her eyes at the end? I kind of want to know what Covet smells like. Her last sent Lovely smelt god awful. I can't imagine how disgusting it is. It is like, are you fucking kidding me? Get the fuck out.

Mike Quote of the Moment:
"You want to get raped don't you? You little slut."

I dropped Joe and Dane off. Joe may possibly be the sweetest and well mannered boy I have ever met in my life. He was so thankful for my designated driving, when it wasn't even that big of a deal. When Mike drinks, he gets tired, which means he will say he doesn't want to fool around, but will end up becoming ridiculously horny the moment I climb into the bed. Which is something I have semi-gotten use to, but annoys the living day lights of of me. I feel like this, I get to see you three days a week. That means I want to hook up with you as soon and as much as possible.

So, I was kind of being a cunt to Mike. Because he was all ready to go to sleep, so I was getting into go to sleep mode. We turned on the Microphones and began to fuck. Despite the burning sex that happened hours before, this time only hurt a bit going again. I am not saying it was pleasurable by any standards. But it had moments of enjoyment. It was so obvious we were fucking. Mike's room is right next to his parents. The bed was noisy and the music probably did not help. This means his mother knows he took my virginity. Which is kind of weird. I am glad his mother is so non confrontational and that his father just does not give a fuck. It is strange, but literally we fucked only a few feet from his parents. Nothing makes a girl wet like knowing her boyfriend's parents can hear her getting fucked.

I slept really late Sunday, until twelve. Mike's father asked me if I drank too much. I responded, I don't drink, I just feel foul. I wanted to say I don't need to drink to feel like crap in the morning. Your son's monster cock causes me enough pain already. Our day was really simple. We did the following: got Mike flip-flops, went for a walk, ate dinner with his family, worked on the puzzle, went for a walk, and watched Rock of Love. After Rock of Love, I talked Mike into having sex with me. He is a Virgo, so he was hesitant about fucking with his entire family in the house. So I told him that we should fuck on the floor, because his bed makes too much noise. Still, with Jesus and Marychain blasting, it is pretty obvious we were up to something. But I guess attempting to hide it is more polite, even if everyone knows what you are doing. It wasn't anything ground breaking, but for the first time it was not painful at all and it was actually pleasant.

I still fear that I may be some sort of a freak, that I don't feel pleasure like normal girls. I hope my day of enjoying sex comes soon. I keep making Mike fuck me, no matter how painful it is, hoping it will start feeling good. This is so fucked up.

Music Video of the Moment:

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Photograph One taken by Samantha.

Nine

I Know Who Killed Me, may be the greatest fucking movie ever. It is so EPIC. You get to see all of the following: amputee sex, gorelight, way too much blue, you get to know Lindsay Lohan's ass, and stigmata. WHAT MORE COULD YOU WANT FROM A MOVIE?

That is right, nothing. Go see it and go love it. I did.I talked to Amanda and Gina last night. They are the only two girls I have ever met that think of Virginity the same way I do. In fact, I was the biggest virgin of the three of us. Since they identified themselves as Virgins too. That it was a part of them. And how their biggest fear was once they lost it, would they miss it. I do. I loved my virginity more then any girl should. Do I regret doing it with Mike? No, because he gave me a very special moment, not many boys would. So, I can look back with no regrets. But, I still miss being a virgin. I told him to fuck me until it doesn't hurt anymore this weekend. I wonder if that will come about. That might make me sound like a slut to you. Or an early sex addict. I just don't like pain. But I would rather deal with a lot of pain all in one shot, then have pain for the next month or so. So, this weekend I am possibly/probably getting my brains fucked out. I am not excited in the least. I wish Mike didn't have a monster Cock. I wish sex was easier for me. I wish I could just have him take naked pictures of me and masturbate. Instead of feeling intense never ending pain in my vag and beyond.
Talking with Gina and Amanda also made me realize why I could not have sex with Ata. Ata did not view sex the same way I did. He slept with 12 girls, 9 of them being Turkish prostitutes. The other 3 included a one night stand, a fuck buddy, and a girlfriend that started out as a fuck buddy. While Mike has had less sex and to my knowledge he dated every girl he has had sex with. Ata did not have the same values, despite the statements that he changed, if he had changed, he would not have guilted(I know this isn't a word) me into it. That is enough of my ramblings on sex. I am sure I will have a lot more after this weekend.

FAVORITE MIKE QUOTE OF THE MOMENT:
"I want to fuck your tight innocent pussy so bad."

PS> I am sitting here watching Grease. I just realized Rizzo got pregnant in the movie. I also realized the moral of the story. In order to get your man, if all else fails, turn into a slut. Yeah, I know this entry sucked. Blow me.<3 style="font-weight: bold;">Why you showin those coochie lips, gettin up out your car?

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Photography taken by Samantha.